.dark skies at confluence gallery.

I'm so thrilled to have two pieces in the current exhibit, Dark Skies at The Confluence: Art in Twisp.

How can I hold the wonder inside of me?

This piece was inspired by late-night stargazing in the North Cascades on Hwy 20. I was struck by a moment of deep awe in the mystery of the dark sky. The illusion of layers that emerge with a softened gaze. A moment of clarity washed over - that in fact nothing really matters - all the details and expectation and conditioning - life is a magical journey of deep learning. My journey is to stay awake and present. The dark skies remind me to release the limitations and to stay in wonder. The feeling stayed with me for a few days and I as reintegrate back into the busyness the truth faded, but this piece and the dark skies keep me connected to the larger and more expansive perspectives. 

Due to the dark nature of the piece the details are not as visible photographed. The dark stitching is subtle and provides an embodying effect around the center of the circle print representing the stars. The subtle nature of the darker stitches is intentional as it requires the viewer to focus and lean in with curiosity much like the dark skies.

Material: cotton, linen and hematite stones
Measurements: 46” x 22”

Expand into the Unknown

This piece is inspired by the winter solstice, the darkest day of the year. During a breath practice on the solstice last year I had a new awareness of the expansiveness of darkness. There is a need for balance and seasons. The season of darkness is an invitation to dive into ourselves to explore, to plant new ideas, to ignite wonder that will come to flourish in the season of light. I’ve been working on this piece over the past year as a contemplative practice to ask questions of the darkness, to be in practice of opening up myself, to allow myself to expand into the darkness, to listen. 

The piece is two layers of fabric densely stitched. As the stitching is dark, it is less apparent photographed. The subtle nature of the darker stitches is intentional as it requires the viewer to focus and lean in.

Material: cotton
Measurements: Measurements: 36” x 27”

You can listen about the exhibit on the Spokane Public Radio or read an article in the Wenatchee World. 

.leaving marks + the search for belonging.

I went to Spokane last weekend for the state library conference. Above is the view from my room, a new perspective of Spokane. It's interesting how a different view or a new neighborhood can alter a place. 

I went to the conference to present about my library programs from the perspective of programming building community. It fits well with the conference theme of belonging. It was exciting to be with peers and expansive thinkers who also want to push the potential of library spaces. For me, it felt that, for two days, I was a part of the larger community of librarians. The conference ended Saturday night, and I stayed until Sunday. Last year, I went to Spokane this time of year when the daylight and seasons are changing. It's a fertile time to rejuvenate with new ideas. The Northwest Museum of Art and Culture had four new exhibits. I stopped in as I was leaving town and was deeply inspired. The main exhibit was Harold Balazs' Leaving Marks. He was a longtime resident of Mead, a Husband and Dad of three who made art with unconventional materials with a deeper philosophical approach. 

Walking into the gallery, I fell in love with all of these doodles and shapes. There's something so raw and unfinished but organic about this approach. Then I read the wall posted below and felt the magic of this deeper well that he created art. I felt it. This powerful process of making art, not always understanding why, but the feeling the deeper/greater pull to interact and translate with space/place. 

"dedicated his practice to the simple, yet expansive, pursuit of wonder!"

Some of the conventional materials he worked with were styrofoam and cupstock (the paper that makes to-go coffee cups). I also loved his wood carvings and copper pieces. His work and artistic language seamlessly translated between mediums. 

The other exhibit featured another Spokane-based Venezuelan artist, Reinaldo Gil Zambrano, a woodblock artist. His work was so incredibly detailed that tell elaborate stories, very much based on his own family stories, memory, and the mystical. Viewing art like this feels like an invitation to sit inside someone's mind for a moment, not fully understanding but quietly sitting and observing a new world. What a beautiful thing to offer someone.

Then, on my way home, I finally made it to Coffeepot Lake. A place that a friend and a Scablands book had mentioned last year. It's in an isolated corner that makes it not close to anything. So I drove the long, empty, flat farm road until they dropped into more open scablands. Coffeepot seemed limited to explore but would be amazing to kayak. I also found another set of lakes about a 30-minute drive due to the muddy, almost-spring roads. The lakes are hidden gems. I can't wait to go back soon. There's something so magical about the vast and quiet ways of the scablands. 

 

.art residency.

At the end of 2021, I applied for an art residency. It was at a time when a transition was happening in my fiber work. I was longing for space and time to breathe into a practice. I made an artist's CV and applied. I anxiously checked my email, waiting for a response. Finally, a few weeks later, I received an email from the acting director that due to Covid and leadership changes. They paused the program but would keep applications for when they started up in spring 2022. I was disappointed by not being surprised by the ever changes of COVID, so I went on with things. 

Since then, I switched jobs, moved to a new town, and started many new fiber projects. I assumed that the opportunity had faded away. Then out of the blue, on my lunch, I checked my email to see that I was invited to interview for the residency. I couldn't believe it. I said I could interview a few days later! As I prepared for the interview, I was worried that I couldn't connect to what I had submitted, but I looked over my application and reflected on the past year. I realized how much I had been preparing for this, that somehow in a bunch of small ways, I had been watering this seed I had planted. I realized I was ready for this opportunity, more than I ever would've been a year ago. I interviewed and a week later invited to the Spring I residency. 

It honestly feels like a dream. Three weeks in the woods making art. People ask me what it is or what it means, and I find it hard to describe it concisely. It's a gift of time and space to expand. To explore an idea with my needs met and limited distractions that wouldn't happen in daily life at home. 

During my time, I'm exploring the idea of art-making as a spiritual practice. Which to me means the process of making art allows you to transcend yourself. When you inhabit creative space, you leave the beta brain and open into alpha waves. A frequency that makes us feel calm, increases creativity, and enhances our ability to absorb new information. 

The framework I'll be using is a morning practice called 4 15. It's 15-minute increments of four different activities, breathing practice, reading (philosophical and design), and journaling. Then I'll go to the studio to stitch. Every day I'll free-stitch an 8x13-inch piece of fabric. In the end, I'll have 21 pieces. I'm excited to see the experience unfold. 

.goodbye 2022.

 I started a small stitching project this morning, one last piece of 2022, a moment to reflect on the past year. It got me thinking about my relationship with making art this past year. It's been such a full year, but somehow I gave time to curiosity + creativity. I made it a priority to explore fiber. I wanted to reflect on the pieces I've made, so I looked through my pictures and was amazed to see much work I have done this year despite all the other demands on my time. I was also excited to see how I allowed myself to explore with the freedom this year. The pictures show a more expansive approach than maybe I've had before. I hardly made any jewelry, but I focused on fiber and allowed myself to push myself. I even took on a strange paper mache project, something I'd like to explore more when the weather warms up. I'm ending the year excited and curious about my art practice. I'm not sure where it will lead me in the new year, and that feels like success to me. I'm also working on a reading list to accompany my creative time that I'll share later. I'm also hoping to write more and blog more, to share and process. Happiest of new years to you and yours! 

Here are some pictures of projects from the year....

a quilt inspired by the silence of January made on some snowed in days with pine needles collected on a walk. 

a creative exercise, I collected the bark and leaves on a walk and composed this piece.

I made this little flag/banner after a rough few weeks with covid-19. I've never worked much with red but it's a color that really came into my life this year. I also made the fabric banner with tied fabric for the holidays. A simple project that brings so much joy to look at. 

I took an amazing class with Amy Tavern about design and made this piece after the class with found bark and steel that I made into a chain.

a slow Saturday winter project. I bought a drop cloth from a hardware store and then woven + stitched it. I love this and still playing with this idea.

In April I travelled to Eugene, Oregon and took a washcloth weaving class. It was so much fun! I totally fell in love with weaving again. I hope to make more in 2023.

This was just fun freedom! A wire paper mache project. Not sure what this is but I love the shadows and the alpha brain flow it allowed me.

.my first quilt.

 I just finished my first quilt. It's my second quilt top to make, but the first quilt to complete. The past few years I have developed a curiosity to explore different mediums beyond metal. I've always been curious to make, as a teen I would spend hours making detailed collages for all my notebooks and binders. In Malawi, I experimented with natural dyes. In Boston, I collected sticks and made nature weavings for my bedroom. In Asheville, I bought a sewing machine and took a quilting class. I've slowly allowed myself more time and space to this past year to explore fiber and sound recordings, especially during this extended time of being at home. I found an online sewing group that meets three times a month. I think the accountability and community from that group has really helped me to commit to my exploration and follow through. 

This quilt has a lot of "personality" but that only proves it was handmade! This quilt was inspired by a book called Create Your Own Improv Quilt by Rayna Gillman. It was such a fun process! I think something that has held me back from quilting was my expectation for perfection, but this approach allows for so much exploration and the result is a truly unique quilt. I highly recommend her book. 

The quilt was inspired by the beauty of one of my favorite flowers, Peonies. My mom has beautiful pale peonies that always amaze me with their elegance. They are fragile and commanding all in one. I'm also including a poem about peonies by Mary Oliver that I love.

 Peonies 

Mary Oliver

This morning the green fists of the peonies are getting ready
to break my heart
as the sun rises,
as the sun strokes them with his old, buttery fingers

and they open ---
pools of lace,
white and pink ---
and all day the black ants climb over them,

boring their deep and mysterious holes
into the curls,
craving the sweet sap,
taking it away

to their dark, underground cities ---
and all day
under the shifty wind,
as in a dance to the great wedding,

the flowers bend their bright bodies,
and tip their fragrance to the air,
and rise,
their red stems holding

all that dampness and recklessness
gladly and lightly,
and there it is again ---
beauty the brave, the exemplary,

blazing open.
Do you love this world?
Do you cherish your humble and silky life?
Do you adore the green grass, with its terror beneath?

Do you also hurry, half-dressed and barefoot, into the garden,
and softly,
and exclaiming of their dearness,
fill your arms with the white and pink flowers,

with their honeyed heaviness, their lush trembling,
their eagerness
to be wild and perfect for a moment, before they are
nothing, forever?

.spring equinox.

Happy Spring Equinox! The moment with light balances the dark. A time to check on all those seeds (intentions) that we planted in the winter. 

Are they budding?
Are they being nourished?

It's a time to stop and honor the light and seasons. We are embarking on spring (despite the threat of a snow storm in Boston tomorrow) the light is returning to us, the days are growing longer and flowers are waking up - blooming. I love this transition, its reprieve from winter isolation to me - newness (birth). It's an important time for us to look inwards, remember all those seeds and s l o w down to ask ourselves "am I putting my energy in the direction I want to be headed?"

This week has been full of emotions for me! The transition of being back - processing the newness in an old space - the reconnecting - the expectations of connections that didn't happen - the isolation of city life...so many moments of realizing how much I give my energy to sources that drain me. So many moments of realizing that I actively search distractions in order to not look inwards. So many moments of not investing my energy in feeding/refueling things.

Why don't I choose myself? 
Why don't I invest in myself?

I still don't have a daily schedule here so I just started going to the studio to work everyday. The first day I didn't know what to do. The second day I kept melting everything. The third day I decided to focus on one thing, an old object. The fourth day I keep focusing and soon that one thing started blooming - opening - consuming my thoughts - growing into an idea/process/collection.

connection

This project has evolved into a new AEO line, connection focusing on the process of examining one form from different perspectives while also processing these moments of connection in our life with places - things - people. The idea that everything is a string of tiny connecting moments - sometimes we have multiple connections to a place or person and something it's just a moment.

I'm feeling so new in this process of art. I'm so grateful to feel this new hunger and drive to dig into an idea/design with an open curious mind as more of an observer than I have been able to be before.

More to come.

.2 0 1 6.

I LOVE the transition into the NEW YEAR - it's so refreshing to me. I'm a nomad, of course my favorite time of year is going to the beginning! I was also a birth worker for a time so I really love new beginnings - birth - the sweet first moments - the possibilities - the dreams - the energy!

I'm thinking so many things right now on the the last day of 2015. I'm thinking I can't believing I'm getting on a plane tomorrow for PORTUGAL! I'm thinking I can't believe that is was 10 years ago that I started this nomadic journey of a life. I'm thinking this year has been so beautiful - in such a raw personal way. I'm thinking where do I want to go in 2016?

I posted this quote last year, but I'm posting it again because it's SO good and SO true. It's time to make a decision - embarking on the new year - what are you going to take? what are you going to do? where are you going to go? what do you WANT?

“These are times of decision, of change, of choice….it’s time for something to go, something to be removed. Anything that is inhibiting, holding us back, it can be a belief it can person, it can be a job, it can be a country…It can be anything that is holding us back. Now needs to go…it’s like we are being stripped of our known familiar sense of security, sense of identity, sense of who I am.”

“…So what is coming up now for so many of us is a new future…birth of the new always requires the separation from the known, familiar, secure past. It can be beautiful, it’s a flowering, it’s an opening, it’s a creation, and it can be very scary…

“…Now is the time for planning this future, and it’s a very good time for doing that and preparing ourselves…the ship’s gonna leave the port, the new paradigm is going to take off, and now we are packing our bags and have to decide what to leave and what to take….you cannot take everything with you. Now it’s time to choose.” 

mysticmamma

TEN YEARS ago I was freaking out sitting in LAX at midnight with all the lights out, there was only about 20 people around. I had a moment of wondering if the airport was actually closed - if we were stranded and I just wasn't able to understand the announcement in Spanish. I arrived in Mexico in the early morning hours of the new year feeling sick to my stomach - why did I ever want to come to an unknown town where they speak an unknown language for 10 weeks?! I continued to freak out for the first few weeks and felt like crying everytime someone tried to ask me something that I didn't understand (despite years of Spanish classes) but I figured it. I feel in love. I was forever changed by that tiny unknown town where they spoke that unknown language. Here I am again 10 years later starting the new year in an airplane flying off to an unknown town where they speak and unknown language. I had my obligatory freakout moment yesterday and called my Mom. WHAT was I thinking? 8 weeks? I don't even speak Portuguese? Why did I think that was a good idea? She reminded me (as she always does) this is who I am - this is what I do - I seek - I explore - I challenge myself. 

Sometimes I feel like life is so overwhelming and complex and other times it just feels beautiful. It just feels beautiful right now - to be scared - to be able to have found my art - to be able to have the freedom to travel - to be able to have found a town that I am really going to miss while I am away - to be able to hear my true voice - to be able to start to accept myself for who I am. I let go of some labels this year that has allowed me to be right here. 

I'm taking these words into this new year. To continue to honor and respect myself for WHO I AM in my purest (ever evolving) form. To STOP hiding behind things - To STOP reaching outwards - To STOP choosing others over myself . To let go of the lies and root into myself so deeply that I can't get lost.

"All these years of practice have made you a master of pretending to be what you think you are. And that distorted image of yourself is really your grave, because the real you is not the one who is living your life.

“And who is living your life? …Is it the real you who judges yourself and punishes yourself… Is it the real you who abuses your body? Is it the real you who doesn’t even like yourself? Is it really the real you who is dreaming all that? No, it’s not the real you.”

“When you recover awareness, you resurrect and come back to life."

.hi holiday season.

Whoa! The new moon has brought so much many new ventures and potential projects for my jewelry business, AEO designs. Yesterday I realized "oh this is what holiday season prep feels like!!" but I love it. So grateful for all the abundance in my life right now. 

DREAM DEEPER AND WIDER!!

.friday night.

"What you seek is seeking you"

RUMI

.energy.

This moon brought new energies and new perspectives on old thoughts. I'm just sitting with them right now - wondering if it's time for change - wondering it it's time to let go - knowing another transition is here. 

I started thinking about being at the birth center - I haven't thought about births, appointments or 24 hours rotations in a long time. I'm not even sure why I'm thinking about it. I went to the studio because it always clears my energy. I spent Tuesday and Wednesday in the studio. I lost track of time and forgot to eat. It's still there. That energy that feeds me. That energy that cleanses my spirit. I'm so grateful for my art to have access to a source that realigns me. 

What's your energy source? What washes over your soul? What fills you up when other things are changing? 

________________________________________________________

My friend is taking photographs of my jewels today for a new online store that's in the works for the holiday shopping season. SO excited to share it with you all soon.

.where I'm from.

A few weeks ago I went back to Washington, my home state for a few days for a dear friends' wedding after a year and that was only for 2 days so it's really been 2 years since I have spent a good amount of time in Washington. I was excited to see what it felt like to be in Washington. What would the year on the East Coast feel like - would I feel/see the difference in my reflection against the PNW background?

I did. It felt different. It felt quiet. There was a solitude, which felt big and a little lonely to my east coast layers. Then we went for a hike up castle rock and there it was - that feeling - that energy - that belonging. If there's anything that reminds me of where I am from it's those desert hues of the sage foothills. Maybe it's not my home but those are the hills that raised me - the hills that taught me to feel inspirations - the hills that calm me - the hills I use to whisper my secrets to - the hills that fill my soul with the urge to create - those hills are my cleansing ocean wave in the the arid inland terrain.

What gives you that urge? Overflows your soul? Energizes your whole being? Where do you find that? I'd love to hear!!

.making.

That energy/urge/push is back. I've been so inspired this summer but that need to make something hasn't been there. I've been sitting in the inspiration knowing the energy would come but not knowing when or in what form it would show itself. 

I created an office space and started to decorate it with found objects from my summer travels. Then it started to come - the energy/urge/push - the desire to work with clay again. 

The need to bring clay + metal together. The malleable with the rigid.  
To embody the texture of the sea. 
To hold the healing/peace in each ware - a physical mantra.

slow down

breathe abundance

let your secrets dissolve into known truths

renewed in every moment

exposed/vulnerable

with the distractions muted

to be present to

silent discoveries