.becoming and becoming.

January is the perfect season for slow stitches. I find myself squeezing in time to finish the quilting on this lap sized quilt I'm calling "becoming and becoming." Not for the need to finish it quickly but the need to be in the meditation of stitching. 

It's been a very slow project, starting with the hand dyed indigo cotton from over a year ago. I knew when I dyed the yardage I wanted to include it in a quilt. It's such a beautifully rich color. A quilt is something the quilter has to spend a lot of time with, so you need to find joy in the fabrics and indigo seems to be a color that just pulls me in.

In July, after my slow stitching class at the guild I knew I was ready for some hand sewing. I pieced together a tiny little log cabin square of indigo and white. I imagined a quilt of nine or twelve smaller log cabin squares but when sewing machine broke, I decided to let that be a creative invitation. So, by the time I added the fifth layer of the first square, I decided to keep building on the one square,  hand sewing alternating strips of indigo and white. After a few more layers, I allowed myself to release further into the project, letting go of the classic log cabin style, allowing improv and chance to design the quilt. If the indigo exceeded the length of a side, I cut it and continued onto the next side, disrupting the balance of the pattern, until suddenly I introduce bright yellow triangles illustrating the radiating/expanding energy of intention of the quilt - the forever process of becoming. 

This is my first fully handsewn lap quilt. The project has taken months and has been picked up and set down over and over again until finally layered and pinned up by the end of the year. That was my goal, to fit the quilt into 2024, perfectly lining up for a slow stitch project of January. I think this should always be my plan because the big canvas to stitch on feels like salve for the cold and dark soul of winter. 

To find the sweet meditative rhythm of holding all the layers together - round and round and round - until you read the edge and at that point I'm planning on adding an electric yellow/green stitches in a larger circle. 

And then I found this poem online, which seems to give words to all the feelings of a slow stitch and finishing this slow quilt in January. 

.I am expanding.

Suddenly, it's summer solstice. The dark days of January and whirlwind of April have evaporated into the longest day of the year. 

I didn't make it up for the first light. By the time I woke up at five, my living room was already full with light. Today the sun rose so far to the northeast I couldn't even see it from my window, falling exactly where the corner of my house meets between the two windows, making the softest filtered yellow glow this morning. 

I decided to restart my 4-15s creativity schedule. I'm feeling very creative lately, so many ideas! The structure of the morning routine (dedicated short readings) presents new perspectives! Today I picked up Designing from Nature: A source book for artist and craftsmen by Esther Warner Dendel. A book I found last year at the Grunewald Guild. Esther was an eccentric artist, sculptor, and prolific writer from Iowa, who was deeply informed by her time in Liberia. The book serendipitously opens talking about light. 

"Really noticing how light changes from hour to hour and trying to catch these changes in words makes any day interesting. The interest has to be in you, not in the sky. People say, "That doesn't interest me." They should say, "I have not interested myself in that." As soon as someone realizes that interest has to reside inside oneself, not in the thing being observed, the first step has been made toward richer life."

What I've interested myself with this week is an idea in the form of a quilt. There's something about the building of a quilt, the ritual - measure, cut, repeat - a meditation

piece, pin, sew, iron

piece, pin, sew, iron

The idea came to me, or revisited me from last summer, on an seemingly endless drive on I-90 East, the flat straightaways through the rolling wheat fields en route to Montana. 

A vision of expanding lungs, inspire - to inhale - expand. The embodiment of expansion. The reflection of my own ability to stretch/extend myself further/beyond in moments/seasons of connection and awe. The electricity of feeling alive, awaken from the monotony that we can some how get lost/numb to, on this beautiful magical journey of being human. 

Although, on this drive to an adventure, a new landscape, a reprieve. I imagined the idea in the form of a large scale sculpture - to be experienced walking in and around, eliciting wonder and awe in the manifestation of its form. I made a quick sketch when I arrived in Montana, and with no further care, the idea left. Monday the idea came back - all of a sudden - this time in the form of a quilt, making an abstract interpretation of ribs inspiring. 

It's a gift to be visited by ideas, so this time I took more care. Trying to tether more fragments than last time, I made a sketch, found scrap fabric, and started the meditation. 

measure, cut, repeat

align, pin, sew, iron

align, pin, sew, iron

adding a piece, adding a strip, adding the section

building/growing/expanding

with a special invitation to hand sew/touch every piece - slower - as my machine isn't working right now. It's a welcomed invitation to be more presented and grounded. To feel the expansion in this season of my life 

of summer, long days, adventures, dreams, and cosmic connection.

I feel myself expanding.

With the pieces coming together, I felt a hesitancy to the straight-ish lines. I don't tend to work in a very geometric approach. As everything I make is heavily touched by my hand and basic tools. But since I'm hand sewing the entire piece, I decided to use strips of fabric as soft start for hand piecing. Although, as I kept reading Designing from Nature, and it offered a new perspective on language of lines and my feelings of resistance to the rigidity.

"Speed, motion, rest , nervousnesss, strength, dignity, confusion, serenity -- all these quality can be communicated by line. What does a straight vertical line seem dignified, conservative, and astute? Why do we feel pensive under a weeping willow tree? 

"When one straight light crosses another at a right angle, the horizontal sometimes seems to be launching an assault against vertical. Yet, nearly all nonindustrial societies assign magical properties to crossroads. This is the spot where vital things happen. This is where the gods are to be invoked." 

She went on to explain the the asterisk is called the magic square by the Yorubas of Nigeria. 

"The arms of the cross point to the cardinal points of the universe and the diagonals to all four corner. You who make this sign are at the center were cosmic forces meet and concentrate"

To me THAT is true expansion. Esther's perspective feels like a beautiful invitation to reflect on the power of a line and explore/soften the lines into becoming a spot were vital things happen and gods are invoked. 

We'll see where it leads me! 

.the season of lush abundance.

 

The season of lush abundance, the tiny space right before spring wilts into summer. The days are stretching out to the furthest corners. The light enters my room some time before 4:50 AM, so early. I'm not greeting the day anymore, instead waking up to the glow. It feels so comforting to wake up to a warmed house instead of the dark starts, although I do miss watching the day slowly rise. It's this time in the year I wonder how much sleep I actually need. Can I spend every moment with the light? Maybe I should get up earlier. 

I've been outside, a lot. I want to see it all, greet all the flowers, not miss any tiny transitions. the moments, the blooms, the colors are so lush. Everything feels more beautiful in this shoulder season.

All of a sudden Memorial Day weekend came and went, summer is here. I'm in disbelief and so grateful all at once. It feels like this unknown year continues to surprise me. What a gift to be surprised and open.

I would love to live like a river flows, 
carried by the surprise of its own unfolding.

—John O’Donohue

The season of lush abundance, like that moment on a new hike with a winding path, you turn the corner and find the unexpected/the awe - a new landscape - a new connection, overwhelmed by the beauty and grateful to be so fully surprised by the magic of life. What a honor to be greeted by the unbelievable mystery. 

To be alive. 

To connect. 

To feel seen. 

To travel all these pathways and find tenderness. 

Maybe I was always on my way to this moment. I don't know what's ahead. Who would want to know - who would need to - that's where the magic lives, the unknown, the splendor, the overwhelm, the reverence. As John O'Donohue says, “when we enter into reverence, we are aware of the deep beauty of things” and “a sense of reverence opens pathways of beauty to surprise us.” Yes! I've been reading a lot of O'Donohue lately. He's someone who saw and felt the tenderness of life deeply. 

The balasmaroot season was such a creative container for me this year, working on pieces both in fiber and metal. I'm finished several projects as the season was ending, a quilt and a small series of earrings. It's feels good to finish with the moment and be open to what comes next. With the heat rising and the colors fading.What will the next season bring/reveal to me?

I went on a walk yesterday and had another moment of surprise, milkweed! Such an incredible bloom with so much purpose. The color and blooms were awe-inducing and I immediately wanted to make a quilt. I'm thinking about colors and have plans to dye fabric this weekend. 

I'm also listening/reading to a lot of Michael Singer. I really connected to something he shared on a recent podcast,

"All things are life. You have to attain a state where your state of consciousness is. The planet does not belong to me. And the people on the planet don't belong to me. I am a guest, a visitor. I'm here for a few years spinning around the sun.

I'm happy to be alive. I'm happy to have these experiences happen. I am the Self, the Atman. I sit behind. I watch the world dance. And I watch the humans react and respond. All of which is beautiful. I'm willing to learn about everything. I'm willing to experience everything, Alpha to Omega.

Light and darkness are the same to me. Beacause I am the one who sees them both. That's what it means to be transcendent."

It offered such a moment of deep clarity. Of course that's it - I'm willing to experience everything. Life is an experience. 

How can I continue to ground into myself/life experience with greater perspective that allows me to be present to and hold all these experiences and layers of life?

.studio flow.

 This weekend I spent time in the jewelry studio for the first time in a long time. The energy just arrived out of nowhere and I listened. I spent Saturday afternoon and Sunday morning working out two ideas, in a flow. It felt refreshing to feel the familiar flow and transcendence of working with metal where time seems to disappear. Coming back to the studio reminded me that things take the time they need. Don't worry abut another season, just be here and know it always keep moving. Sometimes it comes back and sometimes it take us somewhere else, but the time is always right. 

During my last week using my residency at the Grunewald Guild, I was focused on iterating design ideas inspired by the river. This has been a studio practice in the past, taking an idea in one medium and translating it to another. So that's what I did, I took the fiber ideas around the river, flow, and current into post earrings. I love the movement that came out of the pieces and want to try making a couple of these to see where they land and evolve.

The other piece I made was from a rock found at one of my favorite places, Ancient Lake, an incredible vast coulee formed by the Missoula floods. I wanted to make a piece that mirrored the coulee and the open - expansiveness. 

.winter sunset.

 

I struggle to appreciate the winter months, but each winter seems to bring more appreciation for another season of learning. This winter I was struck by the magnificent sunrises and sunsets. A vibrant display of color for the short, dark, and cold days of winter.

I've held onto this batik for some time, maybe I bought it in North Carolina. I can't remember, but one evening in December watching the dark and cold day slowly illuminate into cotton candy sky of bright pinks and soft blues, just for a moment. It seemed like a tiny gift for these hard moments. I came home and knew how to use the batik fabric. Slowly working on a patchwork. I started with a square and then another until I decided I needed nine patches. I worked on it for a few weeks, not knowing what direction it would take, just letting it slowly unravel. Then when it felt done, I stitched it onto a drop cloth, no batting and no binding. This is something new for me but it felt right to leave it open, expanding.

It's a interesting piece that from a distance you can see the ombre effect with more batik squares at the bottom of the piece and less at the top, alluding to the fading color of the sky. Yet, if you come closer what you noticed is the stitching, the mix of bright pink and ecru pearl cotton with varying stitch styles. It gives the viewer different perspectives, something to think about, just like winter. The season for the soul, as a friend once told me during a cold, hard winter in Boston. A time of reflection. These piece feels like a transition in a new direction and I'm excited to see what comes next.

.goodbye 2022.

 I started a small stitching project this morning, one last piece of 2022, a moment to reflect on the past year. It got me thinking about my relationship with making art this past year. It's been such a full year, but somehow I gave time to curiosity + creativity. I made it a priority to explore fiber. I wanted to reflect on the pieces I've made, so I looked through my pictures and was amazed to see much work I have done this year despite all the other demands on my time. I was also excited to see how I allowed myself to explore with the freedom this year. The pictures show a more expansive approach than maybe I've had before. I hardly made any jewelry, but I focused on fiber and allowed myself to push myself. I even took on a strange paper mache project, something I'd like to explore more when the weather warms up. I'm ending the year excited and curious about my art practice. I'm not sure where it will lead me in the new year, and that feels like success to me. I'm also working on a reading list to accompany my creative time that I'll share later. I'm also hoping to write more and blog more, to share and process. Happiest of new years to you and yours! 

Here are some pictures of projects from the year....

a quilt inspired by the silence of January made on some snowed in days with pine needles collected on a walk. 

a creative exercise, I collected the bark and leaves on a walk and composed this piece.

I made this little flag/banner after a rough few weeks with covid-19. I've never worked much with red but it's a color that really came into my life this year. I also made the fabric banner with tied fabric for the holidays. A simple project that brings so much joy to look at. 

I took an amazing class with Amy Tavern about design and made this piece after the class with found bark and steel that I made into a chain.

a slow Saturday winter project. I bought a drop cloth from a hardware store and then woven + stitched it. I love this and still playing with this idea.

In April I travelled to Eugene, Oregon and took a washcloth weaving class. It was so much fun! I totally fell in love with weaving again. I hope to make more in 2023.

This was just fun freedom! A wire paper mache project. Not sure what this is but I love the shadows and the alpha brain flow it allowed me.

.new studio.

I took an extended break from making jewelry this past year. It's been a full year of working and going to school. Making jewelry has always been a personal practice that comes from space + reflection. I am grateful to have time, energy + space to give to my creative practice, again. I setup a new studio and am slowly experimenting and finding a rhythm again. 

.in the studio.

A new idea/creation/collection is in the works!! During my recent trip to Fundy National Park in New Brunswick I was so inspired by it's mysterious diverse vast nature I find myself still thinking about it weeks later. 

I collected some small smooth stones during low tide that I sat on my windowsil as soon as I got home. I kept thinking about how to use them and then started sketching jewelry designs. 

The first project was a brooch with a set emerald green stone. I love how it captures an element of Fundy, inspired by a stone dropping into the river sending radiating ripples. I was so captivated by Fundy for it’s diverse flora so as I continue to explore this project I will be attempting to capture a certain element of Fundy with each brooch!

I’m excited to share more as the collection continues to unfold!

.open lands + light.

I've been staying in a log cabin the past 10 days, it's east off the highway a good ten minutes if you drive 50 mph on the 35 mph roads. There's no cell phone service out here just an open valley of land and incredible views of the snow capped mountains in the distance. It's beautiful out here, no street lights to pollute the night sky, just the soundtrack of the flooded river rushing through the cottonwoods and the chorus of birds chirping. I've savored the early mornings watching the sun rise and stretch over the mountains in the east and slowly make its way to the west throughout the day with the sun rays and shadows dancing thru the cabin until once again the pitch black settles in for the night. Yesterday a storm was coming through and the land illuminated a bright blue-grey color and I realize how in the open land I am able to see and feel the many variations of the land.  Unlike the city where the buildings and light overpower and distract us from experiencing the subtleties of a place. The overexposed washed out morning light that makes the mountains melt into a mix of colors that slowly clarify into the mid-morning shadows of the hillside that start to illuminate the individual trees and the colors separated to various shades of greens and some burnt orange from last summers fire. The shadows drape over the hillside bringing depth to the curves and as the sun starts dropping down behind, sinking into the west a muted earth tone come over the trees, the definition of the land is gone, just a bold emerald presence until the mellow shadows of green fade to black and we wait to see what tomorrow will look like, all over again but different, always different.

.reminder.

I received such a kind e-mail today from someone who was gifted one of my bracelets for Christmas. She told me the bracelet brought her so much joy and she wears it daily. Her compliment just reenergized me and I was so grateful to receive her words - but - I thought why do I wait (rely) on those outside compliments to remind myself of my value? I know the value (beauty) of my work. Each piece of my jewelry is a long intimate journey of processing something occurring in my life in that moment. I design - fabricate - finish - each unique and one-of-a-kind.

Why can't I grasp it's beauty until someone from the outside describes it? 

This moment was such a good reminder of how so often I forget myself - my story. This process of remembering who I am - who we are over and over again. I pledge to continue to jump inside myself this year!

How do you remember your unique story?

exposed::vulnerable jewelry collection

I went to Portugal to study metalsmith techniques and it ended up changing my relationship with how i made art - how i want to make art but it’s always a transition to changing a relationship/habit. I came back feeling recharged and lost - like reunited with a loved one after something has happened. This is jewelry. This is my art. This is my greatest teacher. But I didn’t know how to interact with it anymore. I was frustrated to not have the same relationship - to feel like I didn’t know it/connect with it.

Mark Nepo said that anxiety is the reaction to freedom.

At the same time I came back to a home that no longer felt like a home. In the following months I had to move out of a somewhere that I called home for a year and half, which is like forever in my timeline. I met - connected and separated from people in small and deep ways. I also met someone that connected with me in a new exciting and overwhelming way - a connection that made me feel recharged and lost. A connection that would demand openness/vulnerability in a way I haven’t been with anyone in a long time.

I left the east and returned home in the west and back to the east and then the midwest and head back east for a few weeks before I got west again. With only a small backpack, 4 outfits, The Book of Awakening and jewelry supplies. The great opportunity to learn how to be human - without comforts and hideaways.

I sat down in the studio again and started to make one earrings, slowly. I made the earring and then had another idea. I kept making pieces one at a time with new ideas slowing building on one another.

The pieces weren’t beautiful in a traditional way. The pieces were rough and industrial. The pieces felt like that were showing something they should be, exposed. The pieces are made with no home - an energy of being recharged and lost - completely human. The story I am telling right now. The story I need to tell over and over again to better understand this place I am in. The story I need to tell to reconnect with this new relationship I have with my art, jewelry. The new relationship in my life that requires all the darkness, space, details, roughness to be out - to be appreciated in a way something loved only can be, completely/actively.

I hope you find these pieces to be truth-tellers, reminders that we are all on this rugged /beautiful path. I hope you find community and healing in this universal truth we are all seeking. We are beautiful/unfinished/evolving/exposed beings - looking for a home/connection/peace/purpose and the only way is through in the surrender into this moment.

You can find the new wares in the AEO shop now.

aliciaeo.etsy.com

.stories to tell.

I was just reading Mark Nepo this morning, he was talking about stories - our stories. We all have stories to tell inside of us. We need to tell stories - over and over and over again. We need to tell them until we can understand them. It's only when we understand them can we let them go.

I haven't been making anything in the studio for the past few months. I was going to the studio but finding a big brick wall every time. I wasn't making anything, just starting and stopping - over and over again. I felt frustrated and emotional - the studio is my space to unload/recharge/root myself amongst all this movement and transition. It wasn't until Tuesday morning I decided to change my mindset, instead of going in with several pieces designed I was going to try to make just one pair of earrings - no expectations - no judgement - no bigger plan, just one pair. I made a pair of earrings. It felt so good. It gave me another idea so I made another pair of earrings. Just like that I was making again - slowly - less productive. I was allowing one idea to build organically onto another idea. It wasn't until yesterday and really this morning after readying Nepo that I was reminded, I make jewelry to tell my story. I just haven't known what story I wanted to tell - what story I needed to tell.

I'm back in the studio making jewelry, differently but I'm still telling my story over and over and over again until I understand it. When I understand it I'll release the story and find another story I need to tell thru my jewelry.

We are all storytellers.

How do you tell your stories?? I'd love to hear.