.stop look go.

I just watched this TEDtalk, How to be happy? BE grateful. It holds such a simple powerful reminder  to be grateful in every moment. To slow down in this busy life and take a moment to - stop look go - to find the time/chance to BE grateful in this moment. There are going to be challenging things that come for all of us and in those moments we have to look for the deeper lesson but mostly life is full of wonderful things that we miss because we are moving too fast. This video was such a great reminder for today - a new year - the beginning of this new journey for me to - stop look go.

.december thoughts.

There's something challenging and magical about December - the frenzy of the holidays that collides with the slowing down into winter. During the past few weeks I've been balancing between sprints in the studio making/selling my wares at holiday markets and the quiet exhaustion at home when I stop and look around to remember that it's December, it's winter time. The season is softly asking me to refocus inwards. I'm trying to find more balance and less extremes, to start gathering my focus and intentions for this season - for this new year - for this opportunity to renew myself, to learn myself more.

This is what I started to gather today on a walk in the woods:

to greeting - someone/a moment/journey with no expectations - just an open heart - to accept what it offers me with gratitude, not judgment - to stay present with its offering, as if I know nothing at all. 

I don't know if that's possible but it's something I want to work towards this coming year. To stop reacting to old stories - to stop carrying the past into the n o w - to stop asking someone to take care of my wounds and to stop taking care of theirs. 

slow
calm
presence
without judgment
and when I move towards judgment remember to 
be here 
now.

What are you gathering in these shorter days? 

.blood moon.

Harvard at night.

With all the eclipse of late, full moon and the budding of spring days (FINALLY) I am feel so much energy to create - process - express. 

Spring is such a beautiful time of rebirth. 
Are you feeling it? 
How do you process - express - experience the unfolding of spring? 

The unfolding of spring has been such a physical experience this year - season - time for me. I had a strong urge to totally rearrange my room on Friday night - late. Saturday I made a nature mobile of things that I collected on a walk I took Friday. It's so beautiful to have these reminders that my body knows what I need so much more authentically than my thoughts - that false reality that is created by thoughts. I love those reminders when two totally separate events come together so perfectly and seamlessly - I couldn't of planned it. I went to the studio Saturday afternoon with no plans and created a beautiful ring that seemed to just come through me. 

Also, my birthday is coming up this week and like a mystery I found this amazing yoga and hiking retreat on my birthday. I felt like it was just what I've needed but it was full. I called to be placed on the wait list and they just had an opening. Gratitude to The Universe for the beautiful season of love and rebirth after all the heavy deep dark soul work of winter. 

Life is in bloom. I hope you take time to sit in the moment and smell the beauty that is this wild illusion.

.rooting.

I've been thinking a lot about rooting myself to a place. Maybe not rooting in the forever or even years kind of way but more so in the “be present where I am” way - the practice of feeling the vibrations and hearing the sounds of a place.

I am spending the summer in Evanston just north of Chicago. It has a small town feel with the perks of a city and the best perk, Lake Michigan. I went for a walk yesterday and realized I am only 4 blocks from the lake. I sat down at a bench at the edge of the lake to enjoy the view and started thinking again about rooting myself to a place. What is there to learn in a place? What kind of knowledge can be absorbed from a place, one place? I imagined all that layers that could be revealed – slowly with time – like a dear friend whose complexities are hesitant to emerge with only time bring clarity to the authentic  (ever evolving) face of their spirit.  How is the knowledge found in one place different that the collective knowledge from different places? What could be absorbed if I came to this bench often? I remind myself to worry less about the questions to ask and more about listening – with patience and intent.

What have you been thinking about? Do you have reoccurring thoughts?

 With much gratitude to you all.

.i just need to BE.

The full moon shown so bright last night. Illuminating the land like a spotlight from above once a month just to check on us. To make sure we are all right. To make sure we are still making it.

We are making it. Some of us are sprinting, some of us are pacing with a marathon endurance, some of us are walking, and some of us are taking little steps BUT we are moving as we can, in our own way.

Life is precious.

Much like the spotlight of the full moon i've been blessed with these rare moments of raw clarity that show me a heart - a mind - a soul. Have you ever experienced this? It comes in the most mundane moments something demands your attention and you SEE it.

The layers of male, middle aged, Malawian, few resources, poor hygiene, married, father, frustrated, hungry, in need of new shoes - becomes just another human being - making it - moving as only he knows how - falling and rising - hoping - looking for happiness.

Sometimes these sweet moments can almost touch another one and others seem miles and days apart, but cherished just the same.

Malawi scares me because it's exposed me and made me vulnerable in ways like never before. Tasting the fragility of life pushing me to realize all we have is NOW and I just need to BE.



p.s. I'm really going to miss these market days...I found a new (orphan annie-esk) RED dress and this vintage bedspread/tablecloth...whatever it is. I LIKE it.