12 November 2015

.unlearning reactions.

Do you ever mistake something for something else?

The cellular memory we hold in our bodies from old patterns (reactions) is SO deep and SO real. These feelings started to creep into my body yesterday - a numbness washed over me and an uneasiness settled into my stomach. I wasn't sure where it came from or why it was here. I called my Mom trying to get out all the words - the words laying in a mountainous pile deep inside of me - picking them up off the floor of my pelvis bowl (energy center). I was hoping that she could help me organize my words (thoughts) to ultimately reveal the truth underneath - the cause of it. I took a walk in the cold dark night, zig-zagging the streets releasing the words into the autumn air. The release helped me to find a pattern in my thoughts and words but it wasn't until I woke up this morning that I found the root. 

I have vivid dreams. I've always had revealing dreams. I rely on them to guide me to the truth that my conscious mind finds hard to trust. Last night I was greeted with an old wound in my dream. It was so real. I was there. I was processing all the emotions - without restraints - the root of yesterdays numbness and unease. 

The cellular memory of elements/patterns in my life aligned so closely with that old wound I over-imposed the memory with the moment. 

Our bodies are brilliant scientists that can be either lazy or self-protecting depending on how you look at it. My body was feeling/experiencing elements associated with an old reaction so much so it made the assumption that it was the old pattern again. My body started to activate that old cellular memory - but I am not me that first experienced that wound. How can I react the same way to a different situation as a different person? 

Have you felt this before? How do we unlearn old reactions? I think for me the dream was the first step - the process of acknowledging. 

Love to you and your journey of evolving awareness.

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