22 May 2015

.getting lost.

Yesterday I was working in a neighborhood that I’ve never been to before and because of this I had to take a new way home. I looked at the map before I left I assumed I would be able to figure it out, this is typical of me to assume I can figure it out. I can figure it out – it just almost always takes more time than I expect. I am an Aries so I need to figure things out for myself even if it is frustrating or takes more time. SO typical me moment, I started riding home and after about a mile of riding I began to feel like I wasn’t going the right direction anymore…thankfully some kind man stopped riding to redirect me. Since I rode past the original path I was on a different bike path that ended up being a conservation byway. It was beautiful – lush and green – running parallel with the Charles river. The view looked like I had been transported to the swampy south with the low hanging trees and the brimming river. Beautiful.

This has been a stressful week – there are transitions happening in my life with tight deadlines – I needed to “get lost” – I needed to just go for a bike ride and enjoy the view. If we (I) stop ourselves (myself) from reacting when plans/expectations stray the anticipated course we (I) can find some beautiful lessons/moments/ events RIGHT when we (I) need them.

Always trust that the Universe is taking care of you and giving you what you need.
So grateful.

21 May 2015

.the journey.

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice – – –
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
‘Mend my life!’
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.

You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations – – –
though their melancholy
was terrible. It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.

But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice,
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do – – – determined to save
the only life you could save.

.mary oliver.

17 May 2015

.new moon in taurus.

Happy New Moon in beautiful earthy Taurus!! A great reminder to slow down, re-calibrate our balance and root down into our connections.

 I had a super busy weekend trying to fit social, jewelry and work all in together!! I finally finished a work event today at 4pm and ran to the jewelry studio to work but as soon as I got there I couldn't work on anything. I was tired and distracted - I had to leave. I came home, made dinner and just sat outside enjoying the sunset and felt my energy settle. I was totally ignoring this beautiful new moon, forcing today to be a doing day when what I really needed was to just be present, be outside and slow down. It's so funny how life gives us just what we need (if we are aware) - today I met someone who visits my hometown often for work. This is so random as I am from a small town on the west coast and here I am in Boston. We talked for 30 minutes all about joys and quirks of my hometown - it made me so happy to be connected today and wasn't until later that I realized this moment was totally the new moon. I called to tell my Mom about my hometown convo and we started talking about tiny homes and I felt a tug to buy land, build a home and root myself to a place. This has been a forever dream of mine - I just haven't found the place yet but it was so beautiful to feel the desire wash over me - still true. What a sweet new moon this is!

I hope you allowed yourself time to slow down and connect. What came up for you during this new moon? What do you do to celebrate a new moon?

11 May 2015

.happy mamas day.

So grateful for all the amazing women in my life who have loved, supported and inspired me to be the best me! For all the women that continue to show and encourage me to chose ME - to risk safe choices for wild choices! For all the women who remind me to say YES to abundant thinking!!

So much love to my Mama who has always loved me just as I am, a wild - nomadic - passionate woman! Who helped me listen to my heart and follow this unencumbered journey!!

my mama and me in my wonder woman underoos. 

28 April 2015

.t h i r t y o n e.

"Life always gives us
exactly the teacher we need
at every moment.
This includes every mosquito,
every misfortune,
every red light,
every traffic jam,
every obnoxious supervisor (or employee),
every illness, every loss,
every moment of joy or depression,
every addiction,
every piece of garbage,
every breath.

Every moment is the guru.”

- Charlotte Joko Beck

You know that feeling when you wake up from a vivid dream holding onto it and the moment you are fully awake it's gone except for the feelings it gave you?

I feel BIG movement happening in my life right now - ideas/perspectives/priorities are shifting (emerging). The newness - new perspective - new insight was whispered to me in the middle of the night - it's inside of me - but when I try to tell it the words stop right at the tip of my tongue.

I always write a blog post on my birthday - as a moment to reflect of the past year and looking forward to the next. I turned thirtyone 18 days ago! I start to write a post and find myself wanting to say something different. and I am not sure what to say or where to start.

As doors are closing in my life there are doors opening, which is a beautiful gift because in my life it always seems like the opening and closing tend to come in phases but in this moment it seems to all be happening simultaneously. Although, instead of finding gratitude for the opening doors I keep holding onto the hurt - rejection of the closing doors.

Why do I do this?
There are beautiful doors opening up for me. Doors offering opportunities that I have spent years trying to manifest in my life - yet - I find myself stuck in this cycle of loss. Then last night I realized something. I realized that I am holding onto those closing doors because it's a distraction - because if I hold onto those closing doors then I don't have to take that risk - that jump - that leap that the opening doors require of me. It's scary and unknown - they require my authentic self.

When I acknowledge these emotions and uncertainties I realize that really all the opening and closing are connected. That the closed doors aren't illuminating my weaknesses - they are pushing me towards the open doors - towards the pathway of following my heart - passion - my art. The Universe is saying "I am not going to give you any other options - GO FOR IT." Beautiful.

I hope you are able to see all the doors opening in your life right now.
Embracing them.
Allowing yourself to realize that YOU DESERVE the open doors.

21 April 2015

.words to live by.

"Whatever happened to our dreams? The infinite possibilities each day holds should stagger the mind. The sheer number of experiences I could have is uncountable, breathtaking, and I'm sitting here refreshing my inbox. We live trapped in loops, reliving a few days over and over, and we envision only a handful of paths laid out ahead of us. We see the same things each day, we respond the same way, we think the same thoughts, each day a slight variation on the last, every moment smoothly following the gentle curves of societal norms. We act like if we just get through today, tomorrow our dreams will come back to us. And no, I don't have all the answers. I don't know how to jolt myself into seeing what each moment could become. But I do know one thing: the solution doesn't involve watering down my every little idea and creative impulse for the sake of someday easing my fit into a mold. It doesn't involve tempering my life to better fit someone's expectations. It doesn't involve constantly holding back for fear of shaking things up. This is very important, so I want to say it as clearly as I can: FUCK. THAT. SHIT.” 

—Randall Munroe

05 April 2015

.blood moon.

Harvard at night.
With all the eclipse of late, full moon and the budding of spring days (FINALLY) I am feel so much energy to create - process - express

Spring is such a beautiful time of rebirth. 
Are you feeling it? 
How do you process - express - experience the unfolding of spring? 

The unfolding of spring has been such a physical experience this year - season - time for me. I had a strong urge to totally rearrange my room on Friday night - late. Saturday I made a nature mobile of things that I collected on a walk I took Friday. It's so beautiful to have these reminders that my body knows what I need so much more authentically than my thoughts - that false reality that is created by thoughts. I love those reminders when two totally separate events come together so perfectly and seamlessly - I couldn't of planned it. I went to the studio Saturday afternoon with no plans and created a beautiful ring that seemed to just come through me. 

Also, my birthday is coming up this week and like a mystery I found this amazing yoga and hiking retreat on my birthday. I felt like it was just what I've needed but it was full. I called to be placed on the wait list and they just had an opening. Gratitude to The Universe for the beautiful season of love and rebirth after all the heavy deep dark soul work of winter. 

Life is in bloom. I hope you take time to sit in the moment and smell the beauty that is this wild illusion.