17 May 2016

.lately.

It's been a long time since I've put anything here. 

I've been searching inside of myself - trying to find the grounding of what I want/need. 

I've been distracting myself with the busy life of Boston - chasing opportunities. 

I've been trying to be more present in the moment - meeting new people, staying up too late dancing to Brazilian music and making things with new mediums.

I took a trip to the Smokey Mountains and feel in love the lush mountains (again), the pitch dark nights and the quiet mornings. 



I need nature - I need space - I need the calmness to process it all. 

I took a trip to the ocean and feel in love with the mysterious life of tide pools, the way the horizon loses it's depth when you look long enough and the way the crashing waves somehow give me answers. 


I need to explore - I need to be silent (sometimes) - I need to s l o w down.

I'm reading a new book about energy and healing, "Light, Emerging" and I read the words this morning, 

"What is it that I have longed for and not yet succeeded in creating in my life?"

What are you longing for? What do you desire? What are you holding back? I hope you say YES this week. I hope you slow down. I hope you find love and beauty in it all.


04 April 2016

.prioritizing time.


I've experienced a really powerful change lately. I have started prioritizing my time. 

I'm doing this in two ways:

1. Schedule my time (look at how am I using my time)

A friend has been helping me to better schedule my week - be more efficient with my time. I started using iCal color coding my activities. Although, I'm not strict it has really helped me to be more conscious of my time and how I am using it. I can rearrange the hours but I need to get all the hours in during the week. I use to just let things happen which most times turned into give more time to distractions or others AND making it so much easier to allow fear to sidetrack my priorities. 

2. Creating a morning ritual

I've realized as obvious as it seems, the way I start my day will determine my day. If I start my day not balanced I am so much more open to all the distractions - challenges - bumps that maybe come but if I take time to connect with myself I'm less likely to fall from myself. 

  • Morning Ritual
    • make my bed (this just helps me to transition to being awake)
    • make coffee
    • write 1 page in my journal - this can be anything I just HAVE to write one page
    • read from an inspiring book (right now I'm reading "The ten-second miracle")
    • meditate
    • make breakfast
    • head out to the studio

I've been making this a priority (habit) the past two weeks and have felt a big change in myself. These small practices help me to be more IN myself which allow me to be more present in all my interactions.

This weekend though I started to feel this resistance with completing a task related to my jewelry. I just keep putting it off over and over. I think normally I would've just ignored it - "I have to wait until I feel inspired to do it" but I had made it a priority to get it done this week. So I forced myself to sit down and do it but I kept feeling something. "The Ten-Second Miracle" suggestions 3 questions to ask when an issue arises the first one being, "Regarding this issue, what do I most need to face right now that I've been avoiding?"

Where is the resistance coming from? Why do I keep putting this off? I realized that I was scared - afraid to commit to something and then risk failing. 

I have to make about 120 pieces of jewelry by the end of this month and I needed to make an inventory list. I had already deigned the pieces I just need to quantify the list but I kept changing my mind on what to send to the boutique wth the largest request. I realized that I knew what I was doing and what I wanted to do - I was just fearful. It's a risk for me to send so many pieces to this boutique and last summer I sent a few pieces at the end of the season but they didn't sell well. 

I realized that I need to trust myself and commit to my art. I made the inventory list and will start making the pieces this morning in the studio. 

These practices and this experience of identifying the deeper issue of the matter have really solidified my understand/belief that how I use time/what I give time to is such a huge indicator of how I prioritize and what I value. It's so easy for me to not be my biggest supporter. To make subconscious choices that don't move myself forward. When I allow things to happen it's really not choosing myself. 

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What's your interaction with time? How do you prioritize your schedule? What do you prioritize? Are you choosing yourself? If not, what do you need to face in order to do that? What have you been avoiding? What do you need to say/accept in order to move forward?  

I hope you have a wonderful week! Happy Monday!

19 March 2016

.spring equinox.


Happy Spring Equinox! The moment with light balances the dark. A time to check on all those seeds (intentions) that we planted in the winter. 

Are they budding?
Are they being nourished?

It's a time to stop and honor the light and seasons. We are embarking on spring (despite the threat of a snow storm in Boston tomorrow) the light is returning to us, the days are growing longer and flowers are waking up - blooming. I love this transition, its reprieve from winter isolation to me - newness (birth). It's an important time for us to look inwards, remember all those seeds and s l o w down to ask ourselves "am I putting my energy in the direction I want to be headed?"

This week has been full of emotions for me! The transition of being back - processing the newness in an old space - the reconnecting - the expectations of connections that didn't happen - the isolation of city life...so many moments of realizing how much I give my energy to sources that drain me. So many moments of realizing that I actively search distractions in order to not look inwards. So many moments of not investing my energy in feeding/refueling things.

Why don't I choose myself? 
Why don't I invest in myself?

I still don't have a daily schedule here so I just started going to the studio to work everyday. The first day I didn't know what to do. The second day I kept melting everything. The third day I decided to focus on one thing, an old object. The fourth day I keep focusing and soon that one thing started blooming - opening - consuming my thoughts - growing into an idea/process/collection.

connection

This project has evolved into a new AEO line, connection focusing on the process of examining one form from different perspectives while also processing these moments of connection in our life with places - things - people. The idea that everything is a string of tiny connecting moments - sometimes we have multiple connections to a place or person and something it's just a moment.

I'm feeling so new in this process of art. I'm so grateful to feel this new hunger and drive to dig into an idea/design with an open curious mind as more of an observer than I have been able to be before.

More to come.

16 March 2016

.morning.


Dark slow mornings trying to find a schedule again -
trying to be more open to experimenting in the studio -
holding onto all that Portugal awoken inside of me -
focusing on now instead of what ifs.

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Working on a new collection that will be called connection. I'm excited to share more soon. xx

07 March 2016

.telling the story in a new way.


I've been in a jet lag haze for several days and I'm finally coming out of it. I'm excited/anxious to get back in the studio and create, start to process this time. I sat down yesterday morning with all my amazing beach stones from Lagos and started to sketch some ideas. I liked the ideas but it wasn't much different than what I had been designing before Portugal. I realized that I am ready to challenge myself more. I started to think about movement/flow of ideas. I started imagining creating a special collection of pieces incorporating the hand-selected stones from Lagos. It felt like a lot. I was hesitant to even start sketch ideas - it didn't feel right

Friends have asked what Portugal has done for my jewelry - has(will) it changed my jewelry? Portugal changed the way I view/interact with the process of making and designing jewelry. It reminded me of the lost element of storytelling in each piece. 

Portugal made me fall in love with with light + shadows. The story of elements: the sun + time of day + building (canvas). To me light + shadows are a reminder that all is I see is coming from within me. We are constantly reflecting ourselves onto the world, that's perspective

My jewelry is a story. I have to learn how to tell that story in a brand new way, that's mine to figure out how. Portugal just gave me the light + shadows to see it.

04 March 2016

.just a little bit longer.


How do you process a transition? 

I'm back in the states and slowly waking up from my jet lag haze. It's only been two days but it still feels strange here. 

How do I (re)connect to this place? 

It feels like I've put on that dress that I use to wear all the time just doesn't fit anymore. 

How do you let go of the bluest sky pressed up against those white washed buildings, bike rides to praia da manta rota, afternoon espresso at that cafe on the winding pedestrian streets of Faro, mornings on the rooftop soaking up that hot mediterranean sun and all those "bom dia - boa tarde - bom noite" greetings with strangers and neighbors alike?

It's time to get to work - to get back into the studio - to design - let the images/smells/textures/feels unfold into metal but I just want to hold onto Portugal just a little bit longer. 

02 March 2016

.day 59.


I've landed back in the states - it feels so surreal to be back in my house with all the same things - people - smells just as they were in December but I feel so different, maybe it's just the 24 hours of traveling and sleep deprivation.  I woke to a dark cold day and I'm grateful for the chance to slowly unpack and settle into this place again.